Wedding Gown Shopping

There is no doubt about it: shopping for a wedding gown is one of the best parts of being a bride. Nothing is quite as fun as getting to try on all of those fabulous dresses in your search for the one dress that will truly make you feel like a bride. In the excitement, many brides will want to invite everyone they know to join them for the adventure. But before you do, stop and think carefully about who you should bring wedding gown shopping.

You may be surprised to hear that when it comes to finding your dream gown, having more people does not mean having more help. Did you ever hear the old expression, "Too many chefs spoil the soup"? This is exactly what usually happens when a bride brings along a whole entourage. Everyone will have a different opinion, and in all of those voices, it is often the bride's that gets drowned out. Forget about picking a wedding dress by committee or trying to please everyone: it doesn't work.


The ideal number of friends or relatives to bring gown shopping is one to three. (And three can even be pushing it if they are all highly opinionated ladies!) Although it can be fun to try on gowns for all six of your bridesmaids and have them ooh and aah over you, remember that the point is to find your wedding gown, not just to try on lots of dresses. You are better off choosing a couple of friends who will be able to remain focused on you and on what you really want.

The obvious choice for a person to bring gown shopping is the mother of the bride. For many mothers and daughters, it is an experience they have dreamed about sharing for years. If this sounds like you, then by all means, bring your mother. Make a whole mother-daughter day of it with lunch in a nice restaurant after the appointment (hopefully it will be a lunch to celebrate finding your dream dress!).

Not all mothers and daughter see eye to eye, however. If you know that your mother will not be able to keep your personal taste in mind, then you would be better off doing your gown shopping with one of your bridesmaids. You need someone who you can really trust to help you make the right choice. After you have chosen your gown, you can invite your mother to help you pick out your veil and bridal jewelry. Shopping for jewelry and other bridal accessories can also be a good way to involve your future mother-in-law.

So who should a bride avoid bringing to shop for a wedding gown? For starters, if you have a jealous sister, leave her at home. Nothing spoils the mood faster than having your sister shoot down your favorite gown. If she is not going to helpful, don't ask for her opinion.

The other thing that might not occur to many brides is that money is going to be a consideration when choosing a bridal gown. For this reason, it is best not to invite anyone that you do not wish to know either your budget or how much you spent on your wedding gown. (In some cases, this may include the bride's father, even if he is the one paying the bills!) If you are going to be sticking to a very tight budget, you might not want to bring along a friend who will try to steer you towards the latest designer looks. On the flip side, many brides worry that their fiance's family would find them to be overly extravagant if they find out that the wedding gown was very expensive.

Your bridal gown is the most special item of clothing that you will ever purchase. Nothing else that you wear will ever have quite the same emotional significance. When you are shopping for your wedding dress, be sure to bring along only those that you know will be able to help you find that one perfect gown.

By Bridget Mora

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Write Lovely Favors for Your Wedding Guests

You can write or put together some lovely favors as thank yous to your guests. Even better, you can get your wedding guests to write some wonderful things for you that you can merely compile. People like receiving little books that are personal.

• Write a book of Wedding Guests: List the friends and family members who were invited to your wedding and say something wonderful about why you're grateful for each of them. Print it out (half sheet sizes), "bind" it with ribbons in your wedding colors and you have a wonderful gift.
• Solicit Love Stories: Gather love stories from your ancestors or from other older successful marriages. Try to find out what made those marriages work (you don't need to know them if they have a great story). Put them together with pictures of the couple and give people some new love stories to read and live into. This is a book that certainly everyone in your families is going to be thrilled to receive. (Be a little careful here. Pick longer marriages and older couples, you don't want to make friends who are single feel left out.)
• Assemble a cookbook from your community: Solicit recipes from all your guests. It'll be good for you to have as you're starting out your married life. And I haven't met anyone who doesn't like to have new foods to think about, whether or not they cook. And this might be a great chance to get Aunt Millie's snickerdoodle recipe!

Then help make these gifts meaningful by talking about their meaning at your wedding ceremony. Include your commitment to your community in your wedding vows. Then enjoy the support you've created as you live into the marriage of your dreams.

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