You May Now Kiss The Bride

Did you ever wonder where that custom came from? Well... it is believed it comes from the western world, but has reach the four corners of the earth. The kiss between the bride and groom is believed to have started in ancient Rome, for a strange reason, as written in A Treasury Of American Superstition. A suspicious husband in Rome pressed his lips on his wife's to to learn if she had been drinking wine! Then in time this led to the betrothal or marriage kiss to show good faith between lovers.

At most weddings the "free for all" kissing the bride takes place right after the wedding, but there has been interesting variations of bride-kissing. In Scotland, the pastor had to be the first to kiss the bride, it is believed her happiness depended on it. There was another custom that when the husband kissed the wife she had to cry, if she didn't her married life would be full of tears. There was another custom that the bride had to kiss all the men present.

Today, however the grooms kiss seems to be a part of the ceremony as a symbolic gesture to seal the matrimonial sacred vows just exchanged. So now when you kiss your husband you know the meaning behind the kiss, you may even want to cry.

by Kitty Ariza

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Questions To Ask Your Wedding Videographer

Multiple award-winning Chicagoland videographer, Kris Malandruccolo of Elegant Videos by Kris, gives us her insight on choosing the best person to videotape your wedding.

How long have you been in business?
A more experienced videographer should do a better job for you. Using an established business means that they are in business for the long-term and probably won't shut down next week.

Are you the one who will be videotaping my wedding?
Make sure you speak to the person who will actually videotape your wedding. Many larger studios use free-lancers, and it is important to speak with the actual videographer ahead of time to make sure you get everything you want and to make sure you are comfortable with the videographer.

How many cameras do you use? Does that mean a second videographer?
If you are having "two cameras", then find out if that means a second videographer or just a camera on a tripod. Having a second videographer is more expensive than just a camera on a tripod (usually kept on wide angle). A second videographer can be well worth the extra cost due to the extra coverage you will get. Be sure to discuss camera placement and any videotaping restrictions ahead of time with your videographer.

What type of cameras do you use?
"3-Chip Digital" or 3CCD and HDTV is the most recent and highest resolution camera. Digital cameras have more 530 lines of resolution. Super VHS & Hi-8 cameras (which use analog tape) have 400 lines of resolution and VHS cameras have 230 lines of resolution. The higher the lines of resolution, the better quality picture you will get, but expect to pay more for a videographer who uses 3-Chip Digital cameras.

What kind of lighting do you use?
Some videographers use lights on their cameras, others do not. Some videographers will use a stand-alone soft-box light that gives off soft, even lighting. Ambient lighting at the reception hall will also help the photographer's pictures turn out better and the flash or video light won't seem quite so harsh.

How many and what kind of microphones do you use?
Audio quality is just as important as video quality. At the ceremony, have the groom wear a wireless microphone and have another one on the podium for any readers or singers. At the reception, make sure everyone who is giving a toast or blessing is using a microphone; this includes the person who is introducing the bridal party. Be sure to discuss audio placement ahead of time with your videographer.

How do you edit the wedding video?
The latest and newest technology is non-linear editing (on a computer). Ask how many hours your videographer spends on editing since it will make a difference in the final price. It is not unusual for videographers to spend between 30-40 plus hours on the computer editing a wedding. Expect a price difference (and quality difference) between those who edit non-linear and those who don't.

Can I have my wedding on DVD?
DVD is the latest trend in videography. DVD is a much better quality picture than VHS tape because there is no loss of quality when going from a digital master tape to DVD. Some videographers can customize their DVDs with multiple chapter stops/scene selection and a customized case with your wedding picture on it.. Your wedding video can last for generations without any deterioration when archived to DVD. I believe providing the finished production on DVD is a must-have!

How do you stay up-to-date in the video business?
Video technology is an ever-changing field (like the computer field) and professionals need to stay current. A videographer should be a member in local and national associations. Ask the videographer if he/she has ever been to any seminars or conventions. Any videographer belonging to WEVA (Wedding & Event Videography Association) or ABC (Association of Bridal Consultants) is a big plus.

How can I see samples of your work?
Be sure you are seeing samples of the actual videographer who will be videotaping your wedding. This is especially important when dealing with larger studios that may have several crews that they send out on the weekend. Some videographers will send out demo tapes and others will ask you to schedule an appointment to visit them, others have video clips (called streaming video) on their website where you can view their work while you are on the internet. If possible, try to meet with the videographer before you sign the contract.

What other services or special effects do you offer?
Some examples are childhood/dating photo montage, wedding/honeymoon photo montage, bridal preparations, love story video (the two of you describing how you met, etc.), short-form video, highlight video, recap video, concept video, rehearsal coverage, big screen presentation, etc. This is also a good time to ask the videographer if they use special effects such as black & white, sepia-toned, slow-motion, animation, etc. There are many options to choose from!

What about the contract?
When you decide to hire the videographer, ask to see a copy of the contract. Ask how much of a deposit is required and when the remaining balance is due. Make sure everything you want in your wedding video is spelled out. As it gets closer to your wedding day, the videographer should request a "planning meeting" either over the phone or in person. Ask your videographer if they will attend your rehearsal - some videographers attend, some do not. It should also state when you will get your finished video.

What will you charge to videotape my wedding based on the coverage I am looking for?
If you are on a budget, let the videographer know that upfront. If your budget is flexible, wait to ask about pricing until you have explained to the videographer what you are looking for and after the videographer has talked about skill, equipment and service. A professional videographer with up-to-date digital equipment can start around $2000. Videographers with S-VHS cameras and less editing will probably charge less. A more seasoned professional offering many extras can charge upwards of $5000 and more. These prices are only a guideline, as pricing can vary region to region. It is hard to put a price on talent unless you view their work. Remember, your videographer is creating a family heirloom. Great video is not expensive, it's priceless!

By Kris Malandruccolo

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Selecting Attendants

It's a wonderful feeling to be surrounded by caring, familiar faces at your wedding ceremony. But, if you come from a large, close-knit family and have a wide circle of friends, selecting who will be standing beside you at the alter can be a true test of diplomacy. Here's some advice to keep everyone happy.

Shoshana Kopp Brady is a Certified Wedding Coordinator and Event Planner, from Bloomington, Indiana. She works closely with engaged couples preparing for the big day.

She comments, "Closest friends and family should be the first consideration when deciding on attendants for a wedding. These are the people who know you best and around whom you are most comfortable. Choosing between friends can be difficult and might require explanations to the friends the bride or groom did not choose. However, once everyone understands the situation, things should run smoothly."

Shoshana adds, "At times, political situations arise where individuals try to assume the role of a bridal attendant. Some brides don't want to cause friction and add the person to the party while others keep with their original plan. The day belongs to the bride and groom and should be everything they would like it to be."

Ordinarily the bride and groom select two to six attendants and the ring bearer/flower girl. The actual number of attendants may vary, depending on the size and formality of the wedding. A good rule of thumb is to have one groomsman and one corresponding bridesmaid for every 50 guests, but this isn't set in stone.

A large wedding party traditionally signifies a formal wedding. So if you're planning a small, intimate gathering, ten bridesmaids might be a bit much. More people can mean more complications--in terms of coordinating schedules and making sure the attire is ordered.

Your own budget plays an important role in deciding how many attendants you should choose. In terms of expenditures, it's customary to purchase a wedding party gift for each attendant and bouquets for the bridesmaids.

For their part, attendants will be responsible for the costs of wedding attire, as well as the pre-wedding parties and possible travel expenses.

You need not ask someone to be in your wedding simply because they had you in theirs. Shoshana notes, "Reciprocation is not necessary in choosing a bridal party. However, the bride may wish to explain her decision to friends or family whose feelings may be hurt if this is the case."

Before rushing in and asking your top candidates, think about what you expect from the attendants. Will it be hands-on help, such as preparing invitations and tying ribbon favors, or simply moral support on the big day? Will multiple out-of-town trips be required for dress fittings? Keep in mind, it may not be realistic to have high expectations from friends with especially hectic schedules or those who live far away.

"Communication is key. Brides should be very open and communicate with the entire bridal party as far as expectations, schedules, accommodations, attire, pre-wedding events, and wedding day itinerary," says Shoshana.

What happens if you're the bride and your best friend is male or you're the groom and your best friend is a female? There's no reason why he/she can't stand next to you at the wedding using the more generic title of Attendant, rather than groomsman or bridesmaid.

Don't be too concerned if you haven't got the same number of bridesmaids as groomsmen. There's no rule dictating the numbers must be equal.

There are plenty of other roles good friends and family can play in your wedding. Here are some possible suggestions:

• Greeter
• Program distribution
• Candle lighting for the ceremony
• Guest book attendant
• Gift table attendant
• Favor distribution
• Poem reader
• Soloist or musician at ceremony or reception
• Birdseed or rice distribution
• Junior bridesmaid (typically girls ages 8-15)

Finally, senior family members and those less agile could be singled out with a special mention in the program or given a corsage or boutonniere.

by Kathryn Lemmon

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